[RML] SPAM

Bruce Sambell (ausyfish at tpgi.com.au)
Sun, 3 Aug 1997 18:20:34 +1000

Thought you guys and galls etc. maght get a laugh out of this.

Subject: at -Junkie

You know you're an E-mail Junkie when ...

1. You wake up at 3 a.m. to go to the bathroom and stop to check
your e-mail on the way back to bed.

2. You get a tattoo that reads "This body best viewed with
Netscape Navigator 3.0 or higher."

3. You name your child Dotcom.

4. You turn off your modem and get this awful empty feeling,
like you just pulled the plug on a loved one.

5. You spend half of the plane trip with your laptop on your
lap...and your child in the overhead compartment.

>>>6. You decide to stay in college for an additional year or two,
just for the free Internet access.

7. You laugh at people with 14000-baud modems.

8. You start using smileys in your snail mail. : )

9. Your hard drive crashes. You haven't logged in for two hours.
You start to twitch. You pick up the phone and manually dial
your ISP's access number. You try to hum to communicate with
the modem...and you succeed.

10. You find yourself typing "com" after every period when using
a word processor.com

11. You refer to going to the bathroom as downloading.

12. You start introducing yourself as "JohnDoe at CSi dot com."

13. All of your friends have an at in their names.

14. Your cat has its own home page.

15. You can't call your mother...she doesn't have a modem.

16. You check your mail. It says "no new messages." So you check
it again.

17. Your phone bill comes to your doorstep in a box.

18. You don't know what sex three of your closest friends are,
because they have neutral nicknames and you never bothered to
ask.

19. You move into a new house and decide to Netscape before you
landscape.

20. You tell the cab driver you live at
"http://1000.edison.garden/house/brick.html."

21. You start tilting your head sideways to smile.

Best Regard,
Bruce Sambell
<ausyfish at tpgi.com.au>